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2014 Game Retrospective - Part 5

T'was the night before Christmas, and I couldn't think up a rhyme... No, seriously, it would be the obvious joke to make here: An intro in rhyme. I've never been good with that though, so let's just jump into the continuing recap of 2014 in the comedy stylings of myself and Jen.


Best Game To Make Your Mom Play While You Film:
Slender: The Arrival
Slender: The Arrival
Jen:
The hype may have cooled since the release of the original Slender for PC, but if you enjoyed scaring the hell out of everyone you know, then this iteration for consoles is the same creepypasta experience with much better graphics.

Casey: Slenderman may have become an internet sensation while I was busy growing old and miserly, but even as someone that can (now) acknowledge his place in gaming-culture mythos... did anyone re-buy this thing on console?


Best Physical DLC:
Amiibos
Nintendo Amiibo Collection
J: You may have foregone the Skylanders craze, and you might have convinced yourself to stay away from Disney Infinity: Marvel Heroes, but Nintendo has hit their fanbase with the suckerpunch of collectible figures that are useable in-game. It makes me feel like a sucker, but I bought two for myself straight away. Nintendo, you are monsters.

C: I really do need to start charging for the Pokemon Daycare-style training camp I've set up in my house. So many friends are into these Amiibos. I personally only have the one that came with Smash Bros. (Mario) but there's about 5 or 6 I have on the go right now training up for tournaments down the road.


Best Live Re-enactment of D-Day:
Skylanders: Trap Team (Launch Day)
Skylanders: Trap Team
J:
Scores of screaming children hastily grabbing figures, beating the shit out of each other for their finds. The dead-eyed parents that gave up corralling their young carrying armfuls of figures and sets. The haunted look on the faces of the staff that tried to contain the madness. All this and more at your local Toys 'R Us! Seriously though, I was afraid for my life.

C: Cripes. I'm glad to have missed out on that one. There would have only been two options for how that ended, had I been involved: Casey punches a child, or Casey is punched BY a child.


Best System with the Most Pointless Shit:
Nintendo 3DS
Nintendo 3DS
J: Looking through a complete release list of 2014 was very eye-opening, because it is truly astounding how much ridiculous shovelware has been released for this system in the last year.

C: I mean... to be fair, Nintendo has always been pretty good about heaping on the shovel-wear, since the Wii at least. This year it was just that the 3DS was the most popular gaming console, so every dev house and their dog was throwing some piece of crap at the wall hoping it'd stick and become the next NintenDogs.

 

Best Game That Didn't Ship With Its Core Feature:
Halo The Master Chief Collection
Halo: The Master Chief Collection
C: I made mentions of my disappointment of Halo's Master Chief Collection in my review. Multiplayer is kind of its claim to fame... how could it be permitted to release without that feature working? -- This is the scariest sign of the times for me personally, remember when we used to wait until the game was finished before releasing it on the populus?

J: You had one job.